“It’s time to stop beating yourself up.” 

When I speak to groups of students or educators, I make sure to touch on self-compassion as an important part of mindfulness practice.  Typically, I begin with the statement above, shortly followed by, “…it’s not working, nor is it doing what you think it is.” 

I start my overview of self-compassion with this because the experience of mentally beating oneself up is rather universal in our culture.  Just about everyone does it, and I would guess that you do, too.  

Negative self-talk and the inner critic are so pervasive because many people see it as useful.  Some people even resist being gentler with themselves because they think self-flagellation is how they “hold themselves accountable” or “stay in line” or “teach themselves a lesson” when they mess up.